My Life!!

I open my eyes
But maybe its better they stay closed
For what misery today will bring
I just don't know

Every day is like the one before
I find I'm more hurt and lost
Than ever before

I can't remember a time
Where I was happy and smiling
It feels like forever
That inside I've been dying

It's strange
But I've got use to it
Being this way
It's part of my life now
Depressed everyday

I thrive on the sadness
That tears my heart
I find some sort of comfort in it
This pain that rips me apart

I was once smiling
Once warm
And so care free
Now I look at myself
And say
"What has happened to me?"

What made me this way?
So cold and lost
Were the memories so bad
That I forced them to be forgot

How I can brake free?
And leave this behind
I'm tired of being this way all the time

I just want to be held close
But I know I'll push everyone away
I'm too scared to let anyone in
Because I know no one will stay

How do you fix a soul
Which has pieces long gone
How do you fix a life?
That has gone so badly wrong

This is who I am
Every day and every night